Having a child changes your life in so many ways. Most people will already have fallen in love with their little one while they’re still in the womb. As soon as they make their way into the big, wide world, they become your priority. Nothing else comes close to the level of importance that this tiny being holds over your heart. So, it’s not all too surprising that having kids will alter your relationship with your partner in many ways too! Now, people will often ask new parents, if their relationship with their significant other is any the better or worse for having a child. There’s no easy answer to this, of course, as different people will react to the new addition to their life in different ways. As a new parent, you can never know what to expect. However, here are a few ways that your relationship with your partner may differ once you start hearing the pitter patter of tiny feet on your floor.
Having a child is exhausting. This is undeniable. Babies have no sense of time and have much shorter sleep patterns than adults. Though they sleep for (on average) 13 hours a day, this isn’t solid sleep. Your baby will often nap and awake once every few hours. So you should be prepared for restless nights with regular calls for feeding, attention and love. This is all part and parcel of being a new parent, however, it often unsurprisingly results in tensions, as you and your partner will be tired and thus have shorter tempers with one another. The odd snap here and there is completely normal. The key to overcoming this is to acknowledge that you are both tired and you have to give one another as much help and support as possible. Don’t allow night feeding to fall entirely on the shoulder of one parent or another. Even if you are breast feeding, milk can be expressed, ready for feeds at inconvenient times.
Absence Doesn’t Make the Heart Grow Fonder
Sometimes, you will realise that your partner isn’t the parent that you imagined them to be. This is always a disappointing realisation, and sometimes it may be something that they overcome. Perhaps they are just struggling to adjust themselves to their new responsibilities or are overwhelmed and dealing with their stress in unproductive ways. However, if issues continue for a lengthy period of time and your partner doesn’t react positively to suggestions of support and help, it may be better for you to continue your parenting journey as the child’s primary carer. You can find help through Austin Kemp Family Law Divorce Solicitors.
It is important that you and your partner still have a little time alone, undisturbed in one another’s company. While this may not be achievable while your newborn is still young, as time goes on, you shouldn’t feel any guilt about leaving them with a trusted relative, friend or professional carer for a night. This will give you and your partner time to bond and reconnect with one another without distraction. You both deserve to kick back and relax at some point, so ensure you get the rest that you need. Use this opportunity for a comfortable night in with a takeaway and film, a meal out or perhaps even a couple’s massage at the spa.
It is important to remember that all sorts of life events can have a profound effect on your relationship, so it’s important that you don’t stress too much about how your new addition will change things between you and your loved one. With compromise, effort and caring, the experience of parenthood will more often than not bring you together and strengthen your bond.