Having Children Will Always Alter Your Relationship With Your Partner, But Is It For Better or Worse?

Having a child changes your life in so many ways. Most people will already have fallen in love with their little one while they’re still in the womb. As soon as they make their way into the big, wide world, they become your priority. Nothing else comes close to the level of importance that this tiny being holds over your heart. So, it’s not all too surprising that having kids will alter your relationship with your partner in many ways too! Now, people will often ask new parents, if their relationship with their significant other is any the better or worse for having a child. There’s no easy answer to this, of course, as different people will react to the new addition to their life in different ways. As a new parent, you can never know what to expect. However, here are a few ways that your relationship with your partner may differ once you start hearing the pitter patter of tiny feet on your floor.

Tired Tension

Having a child is exhausting. This is undeniable. Babies have no sense of time and have much shorter sleep patterns than adults. Though they sleep for (on average) 13 hours a day, this isn’t solid sleep. Your baby will often nap and awake once every few hours. So you should be prepared for restless nights with regular calls for feeding, attention and love. This is all part and parcel of being a new parent, however, it often unsurprisingly results in tensions, as you and your partner will be tired and thus have shorter tempers with one another. The odd snap here and there is completely normal. The key to overcoming this is to acknowledge that you are both tired and you have to give one another as much help and support as possible. Don’t allow night feeding to fall entirely on the shoulder of one parent or another. Even if you are breast feeding, milk can be expressed, ready for feeds at inconvenient times.

Absence Doesn’t Make the Heart Grow Fonder

Sometimes, you will realise that your partner isn’t the parent that you imagined them to be. This is always a disappointing realisation, and sometimes it may be something that they overcome. Perhaps they are just struggling to adjust themselves to their new responsibilities or are overwhelmed and dealing with their stress in unproductive ways. However, if issues continue for a lengthy period of time and your partner doesn’t react positively to suggestions of support and help, it may be better for you to continue your parenting journey as the child’s primary carer. You can find help through Austin Kemp Family Law Divorce Solicitors.

Time Alone

It is important that you and your partner still have a little time alone, undisturbed in one another’s company. While this may not be achievable while your newborn is still young, as time goes on, you shouldn’t feel any guilt about leaving them with a trusted relative, friend or professional carer for a night. This will give you and your partner time to bond and reconnect with one another without distraction. You both deserve to kick back and relax at some point, so ensure you get the rest that you need. Use this opportunity for a comfortable night in with a takeaway and film, a meal out or perhaps even a couple’s massage at the spa.

It is important to remember that all sorts of life events can have a profound effect on your relationship, so it’s important that you don’t stress too much about how your new addition will change things between you and your loved one. With compromise, effort and caring, the experience of parenthood will more often than not bring you together and strengthen your bond.

Collaboration

Olivia | Seven Months On

I’m so late with posting this seven month update, Olivia is almost eight months old – oops! The summer holidays completely ran away with me! Again, Olivia has changed quite a lot since her last update and has really got her own little personality going on now.

She’s loving finger foods at the moment but still loves a bowl of porridge in the morning. She still loves her fruity wafer biscuits too and really likes rice cakes.She’s now rolling over a lot and is even managing to sit up unaided – she does get quite shocked when she realises she is sitting there all by herself though!

She is noticing the world around her more and more – she loves being out in the open air, looking at trees or sitting down in the garden, playing with the grass. She’s also started to notice animals a lot more – her grandparents currently have two dogs staying at theirs and Olivia gets so excited every time they come into the room!

She is still hair pulling constantly – I think it is a comfort thing – and she’s adoring her big brother more and more each day. I think it is going to be strange for her having Jack back at school as she’s had six whole weeks of having him at home, playing with her and doing fun things as a family. But hopefully she’ll continue to try to do the things she has been attempting and she may actually manage it without Jack going and getting it for her – she’s become quite lazy over the summer holidays at trying to get anywhere because she knows Jack will just get it for her. She’s been trying to crawl and is desperate to so maybe we might see that happen in the next few weeks…she just wants to keep moving!

I’m now starting to pick up presents for her Christmas gifts and birthday – starting early as she’s born exactly two weeks after and Jack is exactly three weeks before. Have you started Christmas shopping yet??

Coconut Oil : Some Tips For New Mums That You May Not Have Known

coconut oil

Did you know that Coconut Oil is a great all-in-one product for new mums?

From treating cradle cap to acting as an organic moisturiser and oil for a baby massage, The Groovy Food Company Organic Extra Virgin Coconut Oil is the perfect, 100% raw, all-natural and versatile product to use on both mother and baby’s delicate skin.

YOU CAN USE IT TO TREAT CRADLE CAP

Cradle cap is an extremely common skin condition with new babies and appears as a dry, scaly rash on the scalp. Gently rubbing a small amount of Coconut Oil into the affected area (approximately half a teaspoon) every other day can help soothe and clear the skin. The Coconut Oil acts as an intensive and all-natural moisturiser. Olivia has had some cradle cap and we have found this works well.

IT IS A GREAT ORGANIC BABY WASH

Soaps and shower gels can often include synthetic ingredients and fragrances that are not good for sensitive or eczema prone skin – with Jack having eczema, we are being even more careful with Olivia’s skin. Create your own baby wash by mixing equal measures of Coconut Oil, organic castile soap and water. Just gently massage the soap over your baby and clean with lukewarm water.

 WHY NOT MASSAGE YOUR BABY?

Baby massage is a great way to help a new born baby’s digestion and aid sleep, providing a relaxing treatment for parents and their babies. Natural and organic Coconut Oil is great for baby’s skin too as, unlike other massage oils, it contains no chemicals. It has antioxidant properties and is deeply nourishing, sealing in the moisture.

WANT TO REPAIR YOUR HAIR?

Pregnancy hormones don’t do wonders for your hair (I should know) – by running a teaspoon of Coconut Oil through wet locks and leaving it overnight for an intensively nourishing treatment, your hair will be left smooth and repaired.

 USE IT AS AN ORGANIC MOISTURISER

Post pregnancy, skin can become sore and irritated – rubbing some Coconut Oil into the area will leave you with smooth and silky skin. Alternatively, adding a tablespoon of Coconut Oil to a warm bath will also leave your skin feeling brand new.

We’ve been sent some products from The Groovy Food Company and have been putting them to good use. The coconut oil (£5.99 for the 283ml and £9.99 for the 500ml) has been used for many of the above tips – and of course, you can use coconut oil for cooking!

We’ve also been sent some fabulous Agave Nectar (£2.50) to naturally sweeten stuff for us – we don’t use sugar in the house anymore so usually rely on sweeteners but this is a great alternative. Finally, we have been sent some Coconut Flour (£3.76 for 500g) and some Coconut Sugar (£3.99-£4.49 at various retailers for 500g).These are going to be great for the baking we have planned over the next few weeks and we have already given them a quick test – fantastic!

Did you know there were so many uses for coconut oil? What do you use it for?

Items sent to help with creation of this post

What To Do When Your Child Hurts Themselves

If your children are anything like mine, then they are very accident prone. Well, Jack is – Olivia isn’t mobile enough yet so we are yet to see if she is. He can be very clumsy so is often taking tumbles – but sometimes these aren’t always his fault! It is important to teach our kids to stay safe when away from home – this guide from the NSPCC is very helpful – but sometimes this can’t always be helped.

We are lucky enough to live in a beautiful village but sometimes the state of the place leaves a lot to be desired. There’s always pot holes in the road that take ages to be filled or workmen digging up part of the path. Jack is at school between September and July like every other child – and I can guarantee not a week goes by when there isn’t work being done on our route to school. Now, baring in mind our route to school is straight across the common from our road, slightly up one road and then down one more road to the school – this is quite a short route to school yet there is always work being carried out and the workmen aren’t always helpful. I’ve seen them leave tools around – so easy for children and even adults to trip over on the school run – and I’ve seen them with holes in the ground not properly fenced off. Jack is old enough to know not to go to close but toddlers aren’t. It is incredibly dangerous.

It is often spoken about letting our children take more risks but sometimes the risks are there without us even noticing! I now have a few things I do when Jack hurts himself to assess the situation. Tell me if you do the same.

See How Hurt He Is

If Jack comes over to me crying and/or claiming to be hurt, I always check his face, hands and legs for any cuts or bruises and stem the bleeding if there is any. I also ask him if it is going to fall off – this is our way of getting him to admit whether it actually does hurt or whether he’s playing on it a bit. I will still comfort him – and won’t tell him off – if he is playing on it a bit however it is extremely important to know the severity of it which is why we do this.

Assess The Situation

Whose fault is it? Was Jack simply not looking where he was going or was it caused by something else? Normally it is a case of Jack tripping over his own feet or just not looking where he was going but he has been hurt before by outside sources – the aforementioned workmen leaving their tools out. Yes, Jack should have seen them before he tripped over them but he shouldn’t have to expect them to be there – they shouldn’t be there in the first place. If he’d encountered a more serious injury from something caused by an outside source, I would definitely consider contacting the solicitors at InjuryClaims.co.uk – we shouldn’t have to expect to avoid things that shouldn’t be there in the first place.They should know to be more careful – especially with children around – and perhaps they will learn not to do it again this way.

Take Action

Your child may just need a cuddle and a kiss and they will be fine. Sometimes they may need a plaster or a bandage to stem the bleeding and sometimes the injury can be more severe. It can be easy to miss certain injuries so if you believe something to be wrong, no matter how small, consider contacting out of hours to see what they say – someone I know’s son recently broke a bone but none of them (including him) noticed – it was only after he awoke the next day that he did. If the accident and injury wasn’t caused by your child, perhaps think about taking action so these outside sources know to be more careful and not do it again. Whatever you decide to do is completely up to you – just make sure you are informed with all the facts beforehand.

When your child hurts themselves, what do you do? Do you use the ‘is it going to fall off?’ phrase like me with your child? Do you find that other people just aren’t careful either, just like in my area? Make sure you aren’t doing any of these six things when your child hurts themselves though!

Collaboration

Keeping Kids Busy & Active This Summer With Sun-Pat

The summer holidays can drag on and we often find it difficult to think of new and exciting things for our children to do. We’ve still got tons on our list to do but sometimes you just have no idea what you can do. Sun-Pat know exactly how important it is to keep kids busy this summer and sent us a fantastic sports kit so we can have some fun keeping active this summer.

Jack loves sports – he is always full of energy – so he was excited to see what was in the bag. We were sent a cricket bat, ball and stumps; a football and a skipping rope. Three completely different ways of keeping active that also provide hours of fun.

 

Knowing that other kids are just like Jack and want to get outside this summer, Sun-Pat are holding the Fuelling Families giveaway where you too can win a sports kit for your child – they have 420 to give away. They are even giving away a free downloadable Fuelling Families guide too – you can enter the giveaway and download your guide here. There are 42 cheap or free activity ideas for you these summer holidays.

So how do we keep Jack active and busy in the summer?

We like to get out and about as much as possible. Whether that is playing sports like above – sometimes Jack goes to the driving range with his Daddy and he’s also about to start golf lessons – or whether we go the park, we like to make sure the children are out in the open air as much as possible.

We also visit our local wildlife park – we can often spend hours walking around the park without realising just how far we’ve walked. We also like to go for walks as much as possible too – we are lucky enough to live in a beautiful village with lots of greenery so we have plenty of places to go for a walk.

We also keep Jack busy by challenging his mind. Whether that is him doing the Summer reading challenge like he is at the local library, doing puzzles or setting up some sums or some spelling tests (education doesn’t stop just because it is the summer holidays!), we like to make sure he always has a lot to do. We’ve even visited the cinema so far this summer – and that has certainly kept us busy!

Jack loves keeping busy during the holidays – he hates doing nothing and always wants to be out. Why don’t you head over to the Sun-Pat website and enter for your own kit today?

This post was written in collaboration with Sun-Pat Fuelling Families.